I eat much better when I am preparing food for other people. That may seem evident but I had the realisation after my relationship ended that when I was cooking specifically for someone else, outside of the restaurant kitchen context, I made a concerted effort to include all of the food groups, the proteins, the fats, the carbs and the veg. Wanting someone to be healthy and being able to provide a certain level of that health is probably where this stems from, the motivation to eat well when its not just benefitting myself. Wanting someone to be healthy and knowing that this is one of the only things that you can do for them, nurturing through the spoon and through the care that the meals prove and provide. Sad as it is, I would never spend all day simmering a ragù to build a lasagne just for myself.
This realisation was quite nasty to bear, as it meant I don’t take care of myself as much as I long to take care of other people. But, coming to the conclusion means that I can start to take responsibility for my own welfare and start feeding myself better. People always comment that as a chef, I must eat so well, and having discussed with other friends in the biz, it is the general conclusion that we do not eat very well as a cohort. During a typical day service, I don’t eat before I go to work, I’ll drink a tea and a coffee perhaps before leaving home. On arrival, the filter coffee machine is set and a few cups are drunk. Dishes are tasted, seasonings adjusted, small snacks scoffed beneath the counter. But until after the service, the thought of a proper meal doesn’t even cross my mind, and truthfully I am generally not so hungry at the end of the clean down. We go out to eat a lot, that is for sure, but a general post-service reccy is over a beer and a cigarette and not over a sandwich.